One would normally expect people who work in a pharmacy to be rather difficult to embarrass. Folks who have seen or heard just about every private or embarrassing condition humanity can come up with. Professionals who know how to keep secrets, and how not to react to any unusual request.

But not always.

This afternoon, I had the man and two women at the local pharmacy completely red-faced (literally) with embarrassment.

And it was all their own doing.

This afternoon was the follow-up appointment of the heeler Mom, and while the wife stayed and waited for the vet's review (she's doing fine), I ran around town for a few errands. Arriving back at the vets' just as the heeler Mom was finishing her appointment. And I got grabbed by one of his assistants.

"You have to call someone at the grocery store pharmacy," she informed me.

"They want to know how grouse have sex."

My immediate response was:

Quickly. Takes only seconds.

"Well, you need to call them, 'cause they want to know. And how they choose their mates," she added, with more than a little evil grin on her face.

Well, we needed a few things, so it wasn't that hard to convince the wife to head to the grocery store. And we had all we needed to buy in the cart before we stopped at the pharmacy window, and waited.

Don't know any of the three folks there, but the man at the window was mostly bald with neatly trimmed grey hair along the sides. A slightly rounded face, your typical male pharmacist, if there is such a thing. Stood and waited until he had the order for the woman in front of me all straightened out. Then he turned to me.

"Can I help you?"

Well, no, I think I'm here to help you. I heard you folks had questions about grouse?

His face turned bright red immediately, he stammered and then turned to head into the back, nodding at the two women at the other window. "You need to talk to them," he said, as he turned away.

The shorter gal, with short-cropped hair, also immediately turned beet red, and found something to do in the stacks. Away from the window. Leaving the tall blonde to fend for herself.

And yeah, she was turning bright red, too. A fact I pointed out to the wife, and anyone else in the aisle. Don't know how the subject of grouse sex came up on a Monday afternoon with these folks back here, but it musta been a slow day.

To her credit, the blonde woman held her ground, and asked her questions. The basic one being, how do grouse select their mates?

So I went into the long spiel about how a strutting ground works, about the center territories being the favored sites, and the hens wandering in to present themselves to the male who occupies center seat. And that studies suggest his frequency of struts ranks high in the things that hens like.

The woman listened through all this patiently, but I didn't seem to be saying anything that answered her question. When I paused, she went on to explain that they have a grouse that struts up by their cabin.

"Up by their cabin...." Aha. We're not talking sage grouse. She's asking about blue grouse. These birds don't lek, the males just display on their own, hoping to attract hens. So again, I delve into the courtship behaviors of a grouse. About the males drumming their wings on a favored log or rock. And again, I can tell I'm not answering her question. Finally she just comes out and asks.

"But how do they tell who's who? The males don't have a penis, do they?" Her voice got only a little bit quieter as she uttered the "P" word.

Only then does it dawn on me. These three folks are embarrassed, not because they were curious about the courtship rituals and sex behavior of a native bird species.

It's because they were arguing amongst themselves about whether or not the female birds can recognize male birds by the "equipment" hanging down between their legs.

Ooookay. I can handle this one, too.

And I tell her, yes, the male grouse has a penis. But it is hidden in the only hole they have back there, which looks just like a female's. Other than plumage and size, the only way to tell is to grab 'em back there and squeeze to see if a penis comes out.

It's kinda personal. So if you have to know, the bird will be calling the police right after you figure it out.

And that was that. Her face was no longer red, just a gentle pink, and her two co-workers came meekly sneaking out of the back to return to their posts. The blonde woman expressed her thanks, at least twice.

And the wife and I went to check out.