My wife finally got to see the world's fattest blue heeler.

I don't think she believed my description.

He really does look like someone took a normal heeler, and slipped on a new fur coat with 2-3" of blubber underneath.

She also got to meet the fierce border collie, but the owner came to the door with the dog, so it behaved like any other border collie.

Today was the annual food collection drive for our youth organization. Our group got one third of town. About 1,200-1,300 homes and apartments, covered by four crews of three.

Long morning.

In theory, people are supposed to put bags of donated canned goods on their porch by 09:00. But most forget or do not bother. Collections were so poor last year we went back and redid our part of town, knocking on doors and asking for food. More than tripled our collections. So this year we knocked, as did one other group.

Over 2800 pounds of useful food. Up from about 2000 last year.

Interesting that many of the houses so proudly displaying the American flag were chinzy or absent in their donations.

Interesting that folks in the trailer parks, many of whose neighbors will be receiving this food for the holidays, tend to be more generous than those in the wealthier parts of town.

As noted by one of our collectors, a divorced mother of two who once lived by other people's donations, you tend to be more generous when you've been there yourself.

If you want to see your neighbors and friends in their bathrobes, go knocking on their doors at 09:00 on a Saturday.

Our town has a lot of "mother-in-law" houses, where folks built a small house in the back yard. Many of which are now rental properties. Went around back to one, and saw a "Beware of Dog" sign.

But I like dogs.

Went on in. And passed a large sleeping mastiff-type dog.

Unchained.

He awoke as I passed about two feet behind him, and followed me to the stairs. And then began the threatening gestures. So I went up to the door sideways and knocked.

Owner, a young hispanic man covered with tattoos (everywhere) came to the door wearing only a towel, grasped in one hand over his jewels.

Seemed surprised to see me standing there intact.

He insisted on grabbing the dog and chaining it up before talking with me. (This done one-handed, wearing only the towel.) Seems it bit the pizza delivery guy last week.

Now, excuse me, but I can see somebody like me, an unanticipated guest, getting bit by a dog in a fenced yard. But you presumably knew the pizza guy was coming (or have they instituted a random pizza delivery lottery in town, and not told us?), so why was the dog loose?

Anyway, I got three large cans for my bravery.

Wanted to go knock on the rectory for the church running the food drive, but wife wouldn't let me.

I think the Father would be impressed. But, maybe not.

Had one vicious dog come out through its open gate and chase one of my collectors for two houses. But he let me walk up and close his gate.

Didn't knock at that trailer.

Nor the one across the street with three dogs, one of whom was a big-headed blue heeler.

I went over in my "I love heelers" voice, which settled his barking and brought him to the fence for a good petting. So, naturally, his two pack-mates forgot about being protective and jealously came up for a petting also.

While cruising across town to check on our crews, I passed a familiar red, white and blue object flapping in some brush by the highway.

Someone's American flag. From their antenna.

Pulled a u-turn to pick it up right there, in front of a town cop. He didn't pull me over.

It's nylon, not plastic.

This is a real American flag, folks, not a plastic replica, and should be treated as such. If it blows off, you go back and get it!

Folded it properly into a neat triangle.

Getting real tired of seeing disrespectful displays of the Star Spangled banner. It is to be treated as a living thing, folks, not a cheap token.

May have a longer diatribe about this some other time, but wife just got home from her wine-tasting date, (not surprisingly, quite late) need to see how it went.