I think I might be turning, well, you know... gay.

Here I am, home alone (excepting the heeler sisters).

Complete freedom to watch whatever I wanta watch. No wife to interfere, cajole, reprimand or compete. The remote is mine to do with as I please.

Underworld movies? With gorgeous Kate Beckinsale in skin-tight leather?

Got 'em right there.

Great action flicks, like all three of the Bourne movies?

Got 'em.

Pirates of the Caribbean swashbucklers with beautiful Keira Knightley?

Got all three.

Action fantasy with elves, gnomes and hobbits? Got those, too. And movies with T-rexes eating lawyers, too.

For that matter, there's a few Playboy and Sports Illustrated specials in the pile.

So how did I spend this freedom? What manly film did I watch this evening, when I could watch whatever I wanted?

Under the Tuscan Sun.

Cried, too.

I'm just sayin'...